My husband thinks I need to change our blog up a little bit and so I guess I will take a whack at it. It has been 9 days since Emma has been gone from us. It already feels like an eternity. I really don't even know what to say. I don't want to bring anyone else down with my blog post, but at the same time I don't have a lot of cheery news to tell or funny pics to post. Life is moving on mind you, our kids are full of energy and that helps me get up and get living as well. It was so hard living in limbo when we didn't know when she would pass, but now that it is all over it almost seems worse, to me. Even though the "limbo" was hard, I always knew she was there, here, living still even if for just a short time. Sometimes I will pass by the kitchen counter that holds a bag from the mortuary and think what is that doing here? I have a hard time caring about things. Anything.
Please don't missunderstand me, I am grateful for my 3 beautiful girls, eternally grateful, but my heart aches for one I had for just a short time.
Emergency Placement Call
3 months ago
I really wanted to make it to your funeral service for baby Emma, She was a Beautiful baby girl, just like her sisters and her mom. You and your family have been in my thoughts and prayers from the time your baby girl was born. If you need a break or anything I wouldn't mind watching your cute girls.
ReplyDeleteI'm just going to say it, and I hope it doesn't offend any of your readers, but... It just really sucks! Yep, I said it. We can only say it, if we know it, and grieving is a nightmare (I decided not to say it twice;) Leif and I were talking about it and niether of us remember a single day of life for the first month after the funeral. It's all auto piolet. Although, I do remember reading. TONS AND TONS of reading. I hope you will keep posting on your blog. We will talk and stay in touch. But this will be a time when your girls will look back and want to know how you felt during this time. Good, Bad, and UGLY! And someday, you might wonder... I didn't blog because I didn't knwo about blogging. I just blabbed to you and Harmony. But it would be nice to look back during that first year after the funeral. Okay, I'm back to blabbing. I'm thinking about you all the time. Sorry, but expect a visit soon;) Love you!
ReplyDeleteI agree. It does just really suck. Love you and miss you,
ReplyDeleteKelsey
Thank you for updating.
ReplyDeleteIt was wonderful to see you at Bunko.
You & Dusty are always in our prayers.